You have needs too

 

No doubt you will have noticed the bias in the way BIG TOM trains people and how it puts the pupil very much at the centre of the process.   But all of us have needs, as Maslow neatly describes.  It would be short-sighted to expect all instructors to be able to accommodate all of their pupils' needs when they might sense being lost or isolated in their own personal lives.  Driving instruction is a uniquely lonely working environment.  Sat in a vehicle all week, having little interaction with others apart from our pupils is for sure going to wear anyone down after a time.  

Being part of the BIG TOM franchise means that you are not alone.  There will be plenty of time to meet in a relaxed environment and invest in some conversations outside of our pupil's mindset.  

It might be tempting to overlook this point.  Naturally, most of us don't like to consider our needs for social interaction outside the job.  But having an opportunity to de-stress, vent any frustration or even just talk about something entirely unrelated to driving can be a very welcome release.

The rapport that we develop with our pupils is a crucial part of our work.  It is a fine balance between being personal enough for our pupil to sense trust and honesty (otherwise they are very unlikely to describe their emotions while training), but it must stay within tight boundaries of professionalism and decency. 

Take a group of 12-15 driving instructors and put them in a room.  Have them do some training for a day, in each others company.  There you will witness diversity; people think, behave and interact in a variety of ways.  The only reason why it might not be quite so apparent to instructors on any given day is that most of us train on a 1:1 basis.  But a person's beliefs and feelings aren't diluted because we work 1:1—quite the contrary.  In a group environment such as these CPD days I refer to, I know I have certainly refrained from giving my thoughts because I'm in that group dynamic; I imagine many would concur.  When we work individually with pupils, there is a superb opportunity to tap into how they really feel.  It is a deeply regrettable fact that many instructors are not seizing this wonderful opportunity to create a very effective working relationship that can help mould long-term driving behaviours.

I don't pretend this is easy.  I've been doing this a while now, and we get invested in these working relationships.  It won't always be sweetness and light, because all of us are complex souls, and some of the barriers to learning run pretty deep within us.  But it is massively rewarding.  Driving tests come and go, but the need for the safety of our pupil when driving on their own lasts forever.